The Benevolent Sister
Once upon a time there was a young woman named Abigail. Abigail lived with her mother and three other sisters in a small-town house deep in the forest. One day, it came to be known that a grand fair possessing all kinds of clothes, linens, jewelry, fine foods and special goods would be coming to the city nearby. The girls mother who was one to fancy high quality goods decided to attend. Before she left to head to the fair, she asked what she may bring back her daughters as a gift. The first daughter asked for the finest dress she could find. The second daughter asked for the shiniest pair of earrings she could find, and the third daughter asked for the best smelling pie she could smell. When the mother asked Abigail what she would like for her to bring back, she said that no gift was necessary, just her safe return.
While searching for her daughter’s specific requests at the fair, the mother fretted her decisions and spent many hours scouring the vendors for the finest items she could find. After finally deciding on the perfect items she realized that she lost track of time and it was nearly nightfall. Despite her worries of the nearing darkness, she decided to make the trek back to her daughter’s anyway, so that their gifts did not spoil. Halfway through her trip, night had completely taken over and the mother lost her way unable to get back on track. She eventually came to an abandoned castle, one that she never knew existed, and one that looked like a treacherous monster could be waiting inside. She tried to turn around and head away from the eerie castle, but it was too late. He had already seen her.
Standing before her was a 10-foot-tall hairy beast with a twisted face, gnarled teeth, and claws that could easily rip her to shreds. “How dare you come into my sanctuary!” proclaimed the beast. The mother tried to explain that she lost her way coming back from the fair and that it was a mere mistake, but the beast was angered. “You will now forever be enslaved to me as my prisoner for as long as you live!” screamed the beast. “No! cried the mother. “What if you could have one of my daughters instead? She would be by far more beneficial to you than I would”. “Fine, send her to me by sunset tomorrow, if not I will come destroy your entire family.”
The mother ran home and told the daughters what happened, and that Abigail must go to turn herself into the beast. Without an ounce of hesitancy, Abigail set off for the rotting castle. Upon arriving to the castle, the beast told Abigail that she would be his prisoner and would need to do whatever tasks he told her to do. The first task she was made to complete was to comb the beasts fur with her fingers every day for a month. Again, without an ounce of hesitancy Abigail did what she was told. At the end of the month long period, the beast brought Abigail to his lair and said that he must show her something. What Abigail found was an entirely different life depicted in beautiful paintings and pictures on the wall of a beautiful castle, gardens, and more. The beast said to her, “You have shown loyalty and bravery to me this past month and in return all of this can be yours, you just need to complete one last final task.” Ready to do what she was told the beast said, “Stab me in the heart, spare me anymore misery in this horrible place.” At first Abigail did not want to compete this task as it was out of nature for her, but eventually the beast got her to oblige. She took a sword given to her, raised it above her head and screaming plunged the sword into the beast’s chest. There was a massive explosion and when the flames subsided, standing there was no longer a treacherous beast, but a handsome prince. “You have saved me from this spell I have been trapped in for many years, as promised all of this is yours and I would love to take your hand in marriage.” Thrilled, Abigail and the prince were married in their beautiful castle and they lived happily ever after.
If only we could all learn to show humbleness and bravery like Abigail, maybe there would be a great castle waiting for us as well.
The Grand Castle. Web Source.
Authors note: Originally taken from the story “The Three Roses” written by Josef Baudis, this version is a rendition done by myself. In the original text, Mary (Abigail) asked for three roses from the market. It was picking these three roses that the mother came across the Basilisk (beast). The mother promised Mary to the beast in order to spare her life. Once with the basilisk Mary was instructed to nurse him for three hours every day. After that she was told to cut his head off. Protesting, she finally cut his head off and inside was a terrifying serpent that also instructed her to cut its head off. Once cutting off the second head the serpent changed into a beautiful youth and said he must marry her. They were wed were many guests came and they danced and sang.
Bibliography: “The Three Roses” from The Key of Gold by Josef Baudis. Web Source.
Hi McKenzie!
ReplyDeleteI also wrote about this story, so this was a very interesting take. I like how you emphasized bravery and humbleness in this story. I know in this situation, I would not have done the same thing! Beauty and the Beast is one of my favorite Disney movies, so it's always fun imagining a different version of the story. Great job!
What I find particularly interesting about this retelling is that Abigail didn't ask to take over the duty of being the beast's prisoner from her mother... much rather, the mother offered one of her children in exchange. I think it would be interesting to write a story focusing on the mother as a selfish or non-ideal character, especially in terms of how she treats her children. There's a metaphor somewhere about living with beasts both literal and figurative.
ReplyDeleteHi McKenzie!
ReplyDeleteI love this retelling and how brave and willing Abigail was to take her mother’s place. Very much like Belle in Beauty and the Beast and Mary in the original telling. I also enjoyed the part about the best taking Abigail to the basement where there were remnants of his former life. I feel like that may have helped Abigail trust that stabbing the beast in the heart was the right thing to do. I look forward to reading other stories you retell!
I find it interesting how you wrote this story. This might just be the result of how popular a retelling of the story it is, but the choice of a hairy beast reminded me greatly of Beauty and the Beast.
ReplyDeleteI am a little curious about the reasoning for the mother's choice to give up one of her daughters in her place. It's a very different choice than is seen in the original, from what I remember; in the original, I thought the beast specifically asked for one of the mother's daughters. It would be interesting to get more about why the mother chose what she did. I think adding more detail there, whether it was the mother's thoughts at the time or more description of her actions, could add some great context to her decision.
(Sorry, this accidentally posted early so I'm adding the rest here)
DeleteThe context could add a new dimension to the story, showing why the mother decided to tell Abigail specifically to go to the Beast instead of any of the other sisters. That seemed like one of the big differences in the story from the original, and expanding on that adds a very unique aspect of your own to the tale.
Hi McKenzie!
ReplyDeleteFor week 2, I also wrote a retelling of The Three Roses! But I have got to say, wow! Your retelling was quite nice. You stayed quite true to the heart of the story, and properly conveyed the meaning of the story. She was rewarded for her simpleness and willingness. Even though it wasn't like her to do so, she helped the beast out of his misery. I wonder, however, if perhaps this would have been a bit easier to read if it were broken up into more paragraphs? I saw, in your last paragraph especially, that there were a couple different topics in one paragraph. I think this could have been split up one or two times in order to make it more readable. A giant paragraph can be a bit daunting to read. Otherwise, I think your writing style is solid. Your spelling and grammar are perfect, and the content is rather descriptive. I especially liked the part where you said the castle was rotting. Very picturesque!